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Setting the Tone and Taking the Lead

Setting the Tone and Taking the Lead
Feb 27, 2019 | 6:00 p.m., Mountain Time
people attended this event.

The concept of “leading” is frightening, because Nice Guys spend their lives trying to be different from the controlling men they have heard women complain about. Initially, it is difficult to understand how setting the tone and taking the lead is not controlling or self-centered. Perhaps even more significantly, it’s difficult to understand why women like it. Glover says: by nature, they are Security-Seeking Creatures. Maureen Dowd, a feminist and columnist for the New York Times, put it this way: “Women are physically vulnerable and hormonally complex.” Women feel best when they feel secure. Historically, women turned to the tribe for physical and emotional security. Most women can adequately take care of their basic needs in modern society, but because their primary evolutionary drive is to feel safe, they naturally turn to a man to be their primary emotional security system. Mother Nature programmed them this way. When a man is anxious, avoidant, passive, unpredictable, dishonest, or pleasing, a woman feels unsafe. This discussion is based on the popular Glover podcast “Setting the Tone and Taking the Lead”. A few of the concepts we are going to discuss are • A woman can’t follow where a man doesn’t lead. • You are not controlling a woman when you lead; • you are merely giving her a choice. • Women hate it when you ask, “What do you want to do tonight?” • Women get this stuff; it’s the guys who have a hard time with it.

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